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Encyclopædia Dramatica
"In lulz we trust."
Serving 16,510 articles since December 10th, 2004
On October 21, 2009,
Elizabeth Olten of Cole County, Missouri went missing. Over the next 48 hours, the authorities searched high and low for the 9 year old girl as literally hundreds of volunteers gave up their time and energies to find the missing Olten. Who could have taken her? Was it a serial killer? Was it a sex offender? Could it have been a roving pack of white slavers looking for children to send off to Brunei? As it turns out, it was none of these things, but rather, a psychotic 15 year old girl who was a neighbor to the Oltens.
During the fruitless search, a chillingly vacant eyed Alyssa Bustamante was questioned and admitted to the killing. She then led police officials to one of several pre-dug graves that she had prepared and displayed the grisly corpse of young Elizabeth. When asked why she killed the young girl, Alyssa’s only reply was “I wanted to know what it felt like,” which even the most casual readers of Encyclopedia Dramatica will realize is the offline equivalent of saying “I did it for the lulz.”
Someone stole my debit card info and spent $600 at Barnes & Noble in New York. What kind of academic thug behavior is this 😭😭
— Only1Ray, source
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From Encyclopædia Dramatica's endless supply of factoids:
- ... that another Valentines Day has come and gone and you're still all alone. Are those voices in your head starting to become more persuasive?
- ... that Chuck E. Cheese (CEC Entertainment) CEO and President David McKillips resigned because his name was on the Epstein List?
- ... that an AI animation named Amelia has become the Waifu of every Far-Right user of the Internets? Sorry about the breakup K-On! girls
- ... that it's 2026? You get to make another New Year's Resolution promising that this is going to be the year that you get laid.
- ... that WhiteDate got doxed and baleeted in front of a live studio audience?
- ... that Christmas happened? We hope that you got that perverted catgirl that you want to lose your virginity to.
- ... that Rob Reiner was murdered? You can light up your smokes, once again, without feeling guilty.
- ... that it's ED’s 21st birthday?
- ... that Charlie Kirk got a sore throat while giving a pro-gun speech at Utah Valley University?
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